the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Randomize
