Texts From Last Night

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  (216): View more from Ohio

  Someone shit on the floor

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  (216): Someone shit on the floor http://tfl.nu/4f0v
  Replies (20) Good night (795) Bad night (2991)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.

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  (847): I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto. http://tfl.nu/j5p7
  Replies (56) Good night (3697) Bad night (1327)
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  (514): View more from Quebec

  Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for

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  (514): Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for http://tfl.nu/ftay
  Replies (13) Good night (1247) Bad night (4400)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children

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  (312): please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children http://tfl.nu/5h1t
  Replies (8) Good night (1891) Bad night (804)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.

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  (804): Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care. http://tfl.nu/7tzw
  Replies (20) Good night (1326) Bad night (4193)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...

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  (507): I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though... http://tfl.nu/ukj5
  Replies (5) Good night (1329) Bad night (465)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.

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  (602): It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart. http://tfl.nu/zh66
  Replies (4) Good night (552) Bad night (1040)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward

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  (717): It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward http://tfl.nu/5j4d
  Replies (3) Good night (718) Bad night (856)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?

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  (630): Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo? http://tfl.nu/ndaq
  Replies (2) Good night (862) Bad night (380)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.

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  (717): For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point. http://tfl.nu/kshm
  Replies (0) Good night (655) Bad night (329)
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.

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  (620): When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment. http://tfl.nu/putw
  Replies (1) Good night (577) Bad night (349)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.

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  (717): By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting. http://tfl.nu/zbal
  Replies (6) Good night (876) Bad night (349)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell

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  (306): I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell http://tfl.nu/ue80
  Replies (8) Good night (725) Bad night (281)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.

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  (561): Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old. http://tfl.nu/6giy
  Replies (1) Good night (537) Bad night (313)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.

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  (+61): Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself. http://tfl.nu/k7j5
  Replies (1) Good night (288) Bad night (456)

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