i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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