he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
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