I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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