sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
please come you make the beer taste better
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She even gives head with a lisp.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize