smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
