I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
