Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
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