from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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