Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
areolas are like halos for boobs.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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