you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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