I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
