Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize