when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
then he tried to convert me to islam
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
