SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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