just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
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