yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
