they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
