i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
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I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
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My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
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