you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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