I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
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