already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize