so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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