she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
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