i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
