He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
