he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
