Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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