you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
