Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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