I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
that's an acceptable place to lick
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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