its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
He passed out mid-signature
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
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