$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
