You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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