When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Randomize
