i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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