come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I have surprise drugs for everyone
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
