I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
