It's a beautiful day for a hangover
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
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