yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I've blown a few things in my day
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
