If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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