Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Randomize
