I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!