she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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