I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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