Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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