Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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