It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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