Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
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I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
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Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
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