I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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