i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
