So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
