But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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